not yours specifically

Ok, they're in somebody's home. At least they aren't "pet sitting" there. Thanks, Doc.

If you call those cookies

I think if you have to put "cookie" in quotation marks, it's not worth the calories. Thanks, Sharyn.

"restored"

Paul and Abby spotted this one (the url is theirs). Looks like they destroy your old photos, so that's nice.

class of... mrphlfrm

Andrew sent me this one. Hey, if you were in the class of... well, nevermind... you might want to lie about it too.

be a "bartender"

Rebecca writes, "When I was a bartender years ago, friends and family often asked when I was going to get a real job. So, this sign stood out to me, as it so blatantly questions the veracity of the profession."

Size still matters?

I guess their pizzas are relatively large, but not, like, man-sized pizzas. Thanks, Sara.

you "must" do it

There seems to be some wiggle room in these enterprise policies. Thanks, mk.

history speakers

Ok, titles in quotation marks are grammatical though unnecessary on a flier like that, but the dangling quotes at the end of events are just priceless. Thanks, Katie.

4-ish

Noah spotted this one at Syracuse, where their floor numbers are approximations. Or jokes. Or something.

terrifying

Laura spotted this one at a Japanese restaurant in Cambridge, MA. I have no idea what "chocolates" means but I think it's sinister, gross, or both.