I'm "happy" for you too

Chris in Boulder shares this story:

My landlady, whenever she sends me a receipt for my rent, always says things like "Thank you" and "Have a great day!" (In quotation marks, of course.) I've never quite been able to figure out if it's because she wants me to imagine her saying those words out loud or what. But today, I received the best letter from her so far. I'm leaving my apartment after two years because I've accepted a job out of state, so my landlady writes:

"Congratulations." We are so "happy" for you. My family and I hate to see you leave, but that's the way progress goes.
We wish you the best in your new endeavors. So let us hear from you once in a while.

It would have been better if it had said, let us "hear" from you once in a while. Then I could "contact" them telling them how "thankful" I am that I had such a "fun" time living in their "apartment."

My own apartment managers tend to send curiously worded and punctuated notices, although never inappropriate quotation marks.

heh heh... "delicacy"

Reader and submitter Martin suggests I can save these two pictures for when I'm short of material, as he believes they're a little "lame." I am beginning to believe that day may never come, plus they aren't that lame, so here's a twofer for your enjoyment:


enlarge to see better the wording under the circle - it says "creative plastic." I can't imagine how creative storage boxes can possibly be, so maybe it's accurate.

you know how much I love eating "delicacies" (especially "real" and "authentic" ones)

no "cuts"

oregoncoastgirl passed on this image which she found here (more context available at the original post). As I understand it, this is a situation like in my hometown, Holland Michigan, when before the big tulip parade people will reserve their place on the parade route using string and stakes, placing chairs or blankets out, etc. The time when this kind of activity began kept creeping earlier, and earlier, and got a little ridiculous, not to mention ugly when the parade routes themselves (lined with tulips) are part of the tourist attraction. So the city legislated how early this kind of activity could take place. Perhaps advisable in Portland to avoid passive aggressive signs that misuse quotation marks....

But I think what's really important is that nobody wants to be the kind of person who "cuts in line." Is that some kind of euphemism?

(I jumped the queue for this one as it seems timely and is already on the internet - other submitters rest assured I will get to you too! And sorry for the delay. Things happen.)

I love "authentic" food...

I suppose since Jon found this sign in Minneapolis (or perhaps St Paul) the sandwich is only as Mediterranean as it can be in the American midwest.

"no standing around" either

Reader Raj explains this picture: "Several years ago I spotted this sign somewhere in downtown New York (probably the East Village.) Is it a euphemism? Who can say? UrbanDictionary fails me."

some doubt as to this woman's name

Reader John shares this picture and explains, "this cake was made for our friend Rina's baby shower. Notice I didn't say "Rina" 's baby shower, I said Rina. Rina is her name."

Cake-orderer was thinking, "we'll get a cake for Rina... if that IS HER REAL NAME!" (I know, I used that quip for "Keith Ellison" too, but when you have a good joke, once just isn't enough).

"thanks" for the "gift"

Jm sends me this one from somewhere in LA. Where they have "gifts for him." I think a belt makes a kind of mediocre gift anyway, so maybe that's why it's in quotation marks.

you don't want to know what it really is made out of

Reader Sarah submits the above photo, found in her OWN HOME and asks, "Why did Whirlpool think it was necessary to put the description of my washing machine in quotations?" Indeed.

bumper stickers are often confusing

Reader Alex sends me this photo. Due to the strong feelings on both sides of this issue, I am carefully avoiding comment on the content of this one, but I really am flummoxed by what those quotation marks are supposed to signify.

not actually unnecessary

reader Kym found this one while surfing. Now, it's not really unnecessary, as the "shoot" refers to the camera ironically because you're supposed to think of a gun. But it's still a little funny, and a little racist.