Ok, so technically this is referencing the expression and not literal travel, but it's still weird. Paul got this fortune and writes, "I'm hoping that doesn't mean 'to a dumpster to try to find lunch' or 'rehab.'"
Julian took this one at a Massachusetts polling place (yeah, I'm about 6 weeks behind). I wonder how many people walked up to the table and said "your street, your house number, your name". I mean, it told you to "say" that...
What you might not glean from this photo is that the little cleaning company is encouraging you to buy local. By that I assume that you wouldn't call a cleaning company on the other side of the border if you wanted your rugs cleaned.
We've seen sarcastic "no" and "not" before, but what I like about this one is that EVERY negative word is in quotation marks. It's like it's really a positive place, except for all the prohibitions. Thanks, David.
I've gotten similar cards to this (or maybe the same one) before. This one is from Liz, the other submitter who I forget her name got it form a mother-in-law. It must be like a passive aggressive way of saying, "just because you married my son doesn't make you REAL family."
thanks to Brian from Toronto for the photo and title. I think we all know what they mean by "customer service": a person who ignores people for a while before scoffing their choice of movie and taking forever to complete a transaction.
This one, submitted by Jeremy in Oklahoma, is a bit hard to read. It says "expect a miracle 'God' is waiting for YOU. Praise Fellowship (etc)". I don't know what kind of miracle they are expecting or if God is actually waiting, or really just the pastor. Their punctuation: less than miraculous.
Devin writes that this was written on some cardboard taped over a freezer door at a grocery store in San Francisco. What I like about this one is that the quotation marks are in different places depending on the language. It also seems that the spanish directions are a bit more detailed.
Keith saw this in the bathroom of a sushi place in silver spring, MD. I wish we could see this alleged knob, because why would you think to turn a pushing lock? And are these words code for something else?
Nick saw this at a place called Big Nose Kate's in Tombstone, AZ. He calls it an "ungodly tourist trap" which might explain why it's not actually a cowboy bar. I am uncertain about whether or not it actually is in the west, though. Or what the definition of "saloon" is that it might not fit.
Plenty of people seem to want to point out that they are not, in fact, in Philly. What makes this one special is the extra set of closed quotes. Perhaps it also doesn't have much to do with cheese or steak? Thanks, Erin.
Ian saw this in the the canteen of a place he worked in Wiltshire, England. I like the mystery of this one: how can you stop papers? Why is it a big deal if they are removed? Maybe you can't and it isn't, hence the quotation marks. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, paper security is minor.
This from the Safeway where Tim works. I don't know how something can only kind of be a "thing". Maybe they don't need to be done daily REALLY. I also have no idea what it means for an employee to receive a "no" or to have a huddle. So maybe they really aren't things.
Co-worker Dave downloaded a white-paper for some inspirational reading. So are all of those quoted segments titles within the title? I guess it's really: Excellence for All You Idiots: A Book (you've heard of those haven't you?) for Androids, Working in a Gary Gygax Universe in 2008.
Actually, I truly hope that "airport rage" is not an acceptable quotation-free term. But it's also funny because 1: federal law dictates your emotions? 2: They must be predicting rage to post a sign. Thanks, Ariel.
Amy sent in this same sign a few months ago, and writes back to demonstrate that the quotes have been removed. While I don't consider the goal of this blog eradicating confusing usage (rather, we like to have fun with it) it's pretty funny when people change. Thanks for the update, Amy.
I don't usually post the following: newspaper headlines, personal email, craigslist postings, unprofessional websites. I also tend to not crosspost things from other blogs, since I have so much unique material waiting for me to get to it.
Things I see a lot: silica gel "do not eat"; hair dryer labels; inside the bus "do not drill"; Wal-mart sign about IDs; coffee machine with "2" cup sizes; employees must "wash hands".